15 February 2013

Published February 13, 2013 by rochellewisoff

WELCOME TO FRIDAY FICTIONEERS!

THE CHALLENGE:

Write a one hundred word story that has a beginning, middle and end. (No one will be ostracized for going over or under the word count.)

THE KEY:

Make every word count.

THE RULES:

  • Copy your URL to the Linkz collection. You’ll find the tab following the photo prompt. It’s the little white box to the left with the blue froggy guy. Click on it and follow directions. This is the best way to get the most reads and comments.
  • MAKE SURE YOUR LINK  IS SPECIFIC TO YOUR FLASH FICTION. (Should you find that you’ve made an error you can delete by clicking the little red ‘x’ that should appear under your icon. Then re-enter your URL. (If there’s no red x email me at Runtshell@aol.com. I can delete the wrong link for you).Thanks to Blogspot bloggers for disabling their  CAPTCHAs.  
  • Make note in your blog if you’d prefer not to have constructive criticism. 
  • REMINDER:
  • This page is “FRIDAY FICTIONEERS CENTRAL” and is NOT the place to promote political or religious views. Also, you are responsible for the content of your story and policing comments on your blog. You have the right to delete any you consider offensive.  

**Please exercise DISCRETION  when commenting on a story! Be RESPECTFUL.**

Should someone have severe or hostile differences of opinion with another person it’s my hope that the involved parties would settle their disputes in private. 

***************

:)  My story will follow the prompt for those who might be distracted by reading a story before writing their own . I enjoy your comments. :)

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copyright-David Stewart

copyright-David Stewart




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Genre: Literary Fiction

Word Count: 100

A little background music ;) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9bYnzs7Zaw

DMZ

Two months after my father’s death he received an invitation from my Uncle Yee in Uigeongbu.  Was this the same Uncle Yee who threatened to drown me?   

My parents met in a MASH unit in 1953. She was a surgical nurse. He was a wounded soldier in Syngman Rhee’s army.

Never accepted anywhere. I still hear the taunts.

“Black and yellow Jell-O. Slanty eyes. Nappy head.”

I traveled in Appa’s place to tell his evil twin how much I hated him.

Instead, upon my arrival in Panmunjom, a shriveled old man bowed and wept.  “Forgive me, Tamika Ahn. Welcome home.” 

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125 comments on “15 February 2013

  • That was beautiful and I loved all the historical and Korean details. Have you been to Korea before? You write about it fairly knowledgeably. They do have a place in Panmunjeom for separated family members to meet, although they don’t use it much.

    • Dear David,
      I love it when I find out there’s more fact in a story I wrote than I knew. The closest I’ve come to Korea was being an avid MASH fan and even that was filmed in California.
      I knew the signs were Korean. I don’t read it but it’s very distinctive. The rest I researched. Google is my friend.
      Shalom, 평화 (pyonghwa)
      Rochelle

  • Rochelle, I can always see and feel the time you put into the backgrounds of your stories, especially the historical ones. Perhaps the highest praise I can give is that I think Jan Morrill would like it. Lovely rendering of suffering, hate and forgiveness.

    janet

  • A very heartwarming story, Rochelle. In such few words you have said a great deal. And one little kernel of truth planted releases an abundant harvest of the same. You have done a great job of pointing out the need for and the power of forgiveness — also the plight of interracial children everywhere because of their rejection by so many people.

    I was also touched by how you and Abraham gently and patiently helped the newest contributor. That’s so important on sites like these. People who do not understand the technical equipment or the jargon get lost in the shuffle so often, and then their talent gets lost too. So I add my thanks to you and Abraham for being so kind.

  • Dear Rochelle,

    I like how you take a sixty year old story that spans two continents and encompasses many lives and condense it into 100 words without losing anything of the emotion, key story elements and character arcs. You are good.

    Aloha,

    Doug

  • Such a lovely story… Recognisable in some ways because I have recently come to understand just a very little what it is like not to be respected because of your background. Thank you for the positive closure.

  • Rochelle, you are so good at saying much with few words, giving a brief glimpse of history along with the character’s background. The ending took away some of the pain I felt was coming.

    • Thanks, Neens. Glad you liked both. Choosing a prompt can be as challenging as writing a story to go with it. Rarely do I have a story in mind when I post the prompt. If I have a problem with it I have no one to blame but myself. ;)

  • Dear Mrs. Wisoff-Fields

    Time is a balm for even the most grievous of wounds. Your story has hidden depth and bears us back to a time the wounding was cruel, the partings long and the scars abundant. Korea, 1950-1953? Sounds as though the events of that time resonate in your life. Bell tones echo through your well researched and written story.

    Sincerely,

    C. Hase

    • Dear Mr. Hase,
      You compliments warm me. The human condition in all cultures fascinates me. What resonates with me is the cruelty at that time in the name of racial purity. Research is a passion of mine. Thanks for liking and commenting.
      Shalom,
      Rochelle

  • As one half of a ‘mixed marriage’ the story rings true. Except for the last line. Death/terminal illness sometimes shakes people to their senses. Not in my case, but sometimes. I loved MASH! Thanks for the music link! Ann

  • All the bitterness that accumulated through the years is distinguished by the humble heart of the one who wanted absolution. Such a rich story Rochelle. What a great take on the prompt.

  • Hi Rochelle
    Another great story this week – I had to google DMZ which helped me to understand the setting of your story. A great piece of historical fiction – and a happy ending to boot :)

  • Great details all through your story. It’s funny how taunting like that can still echo in our minds years later. I like how we don’t know whether or not he’ll be forgiven.

  • I must admit, Rochelle, this wasn’t my favourite of your stories. I feel like the story needed more space to really flourish. It’s a great idea though, and given the 100 word limitations, I think you did a good job with it.

  • We often forget that with time as we grow old, others grow older too.
    People change with every passing moment, every new experience.. just like us.
    Very real to life story of how diminutive and powerless ghosts of childhood can look after growing up.
    I really liked it.. but then I like them every week! :)

  • is it possible that this line: “I traveled in Appa’s place to…” should it be “to” instead of “in”? traveled “in” seems to meaning traveling around but all within appa’s place. if that’s what you mean, then please ignore this comment. of course that one word doesn’t change how well done it is.

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