14 February 2014

Published February 12, 2014 by rochellewisoff


A Happy Valentine’s Day

Henry David Thoreau said it best.

“It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.”


Write a one hundred word story that has a beginning, middle and end. (No one will be ostracized for going a few words over the count.)


Make every word count.


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Genre: Let the Farce be with you.

Word Count: 96


            “To Randall B. Johnson. My first husband.” Marilee raised her glass. “Good riddance.”  

            “To my Randy,” Juanita lifted her half empty goblet. “The snake. Glad I divorced him.”  

            “Yeah, but he was pretty, wasn’t he?”

            “Pretty slimy.”

            “I hear he’s getting married again.”

            “Who’d be that stupid?”

            Juanita raised an eyebrow. “Two ex-Mrs. Johnsons walk into a bar.”

            “You could’ve warned me.”

            “Like you’d have listened?”  

            “There is that.” Marilee sipped her sangria and relished its bitter-sweetness.  “Suppose we should educate the future ex-Mrs. Rat Bastard Johnson?”

            “Nah, let’s just plan on a threesome next year.”

146 comments on “14 February 2014

    • Ah, Björn,

      Sad to say…both of the “Mr. Johnsons” this story is based on are the epitome of slime-balls. But I think these ladies are just happy to be separated. Thanks for commenting. ;)



    • Dear Jan,

      Some years ago, before Jan and I were married, I was with his mom on a trip. I got to be privy to her conversation with her second husband’s other ex. Seems they bonded over their, shall we say, experience with this man. One of two times I’ve seen my MIL tipsy.

      Yes, I am happily married. ;)



  • That was awesome! Reminds me of the movie- The other woman starring Cameron Diaz and Nicki Minaj :) They decide to join forces instead of having a cat fight over an undeserving man. Wonderful Valentine’s day fiction Rochelle.

    • Dear Camgal,

      I never saw that movie, but I think it’s a great theme. I really didn’t have any movie in mind. It’s based on a true conversation between two ex-wives who’d made the mistake with the same man. Glad you liked it. Awesome is always nice to hear. ;) And a happy Valentine’s Day to you.



  • Oh my Rochelle, this on is delicious from the first sip! Love it!! “Marilee sipped her sangria and relished its bitter-sweetness.” Fantastic play on words. Bravo! Witty, clever, tightly written, and just fun to read… great job!

  • Hi Rochelle. A clever and funny take on the prompt and so true to life. I know two exs who met last month in just this situation. But they had tea – and I’m sure they wouldn’t have put sugar in it. Good one! cheers, Karen

    • Thank you, Hannah. I didn’t even think about the movie The First Wives Club when I wrote this. It was based on a conversation between my MIL and a friend. Both of them had been married to the same slime ball and had seen the error of their ways.



  • Dear Julia C,
    Poor Mr. Johnson. Obviously, the man has so much love to offer that it would be unfair to the rest of the female population if he limited himself to only one woman. I can understand their bitterness and disappointment, but let’s not turn sweet wine into sour grapes.
    Dr. S. Freud

  • As I read this, I tried to picture my grandfather’s first two wives as Juanita and Marilee. It woulda never happened. They were too busy hating the idea that the other existed to focus on how poorly my grandfather had treated them both. I think, for many women, there’s a whole different attitude towards the other former wife (wives) today…more of a survivor’s club!! Great story, and the two Mrs. Johnsons joke made me giggle. :-)

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